The case for a graceful awakening

The way out of our collective legalistic mess has to be a spiritual reconciliation

Going to the tractor freedom rally in London recently, I couldn’t help but notice the advert for amicable (sic), a “digital divorce” service. The desire to see less conflict and suffering in the process of separation is to be lauded, yet there is something disquieting, too. As a society we are taking the friction out of the back-end legal processes of divorce, but have given scant attention to the front-end spiritual aspect of the union. There is sound worldly advice, yet it doesn’t quite get to the fundamental matter of the energy that joins everything together, including man and wife.

The clue is in the advert: “10 signs your ex is a narcissist” — with that particular sociopathy being the epitome of self-will and self-worship. Whatever the righteous seek is likely the antithesis of this. Cults provide the opportunity to abandon your own selfishness and completely subjugate yourself to the will of other mortals. While it resolves the immediate spiritual issue of excessive esteem for your own desires, a cult amplifies the underlying problem of psychopathic doctrines running amok: we merely become tools for the wicked to deploy.

Organised religion provides a space for personal spiritual growth, but always at the cost of interposing an institution between you and the Creator as an intermediary. All such organisations need standardised roles, approved rituals, and “rivers of authority” that facilitate hierarchy. Pursuit of that which is righteous easily degenerates into those things that are most easily measured, monitored, and managed. The “administrative sacrament” can easily give the outward spiritual form without the inward substance. Over time, legalism displaces love as the animating force. Every divorced couple has a certificate to prove they were once infatuated, but something beyond that was needed.

The crisis of conscience

Over the last few years I have had many encounters with the legal world, as well as occasional indirect brushes with the religious one. I have found systemic failures in both, as judges and priests side with compromised worldly authority, ignore their own texts (be they constitutional or Biblical), evade due process, abandon conscience, cherry pick laws and morals to follow, and extort those they are meant to protect. It would be crass and wrong to say everything is broken, as it is not, and there is great wisdom in both jurisprudence and theology. Yet the self-evident alignment with wickedness forces us to individually pick our way through the mess.

Law as enacted via parliaments, courts, and juries can bring us peace, but this has become corrupted. When lawmakers, judges, and the public have detached from evidence-based rationality and traditional morality, we have a foundational problem. For a simple example, consider how many barristers took the Covid jab and ignored gross violations of civil rights. Or for that matter, priests who led their flock astray, to reflect the same issue on the other side of the divide. In my opinion, the root problem isn’t intellectual, legal, factual, emotional, or even moral. We are dealing with a spiritual deficit: a lack of consciousness leading to a degraded conscience. How can we resolve this?

I too have been on a spiritual journey during these past few years, and what follows is a summary of where I am at. It is not meant to be final, and carries no authority beyond being true to my own experience and insight. The bottom line is that there are no lasting mind or body solutions to spiritual problems — be they legal fights, substance abuse, money woes, relationship dramas, health worries… and so on. Everything begins and ends with us personally and the values we hold dearest. Each of us has to “look up”, acknowledge our own shadow, accept grace, and repent our fallen ways. This is not a novel insight in any manner, but there is nuance which matters if we are to make headway.

The Way is the way

Fundamentally there is morality and truth from outside of us; we are not the arbiters of what is real or righteous. You can contrast this with Marxism and Critical Theory, which are willing to redefine everything for the goal of power over others. Totalitarianism flatters the existence of objective reason and righteousness by offering its exact opposite: a false logic and false morality. We have a choice over whether to submit to this natural order, and become obedient to it, or seek to impose our own will on the world.

We are “all a little bit psycho” and have tried to play God at some time so as to exert control over others (and we probably got karmic feedback it is a poor idea). The challenge we therefore face is discerning truth and morality (that is God-given), not deciding (hence acting as a deity). It demands that we be in the world but not of the world, as the society of contemporary Romans and Pharisees is often fallen and full of self-righteousness. We really cannot fight spiritual battles with worldly methods alone, as we energise the wrong spirit. That said, spiritual wisdom is not an excuse to shy away from worldly encounters, but to come from a higher place.

This process starts by recognising our own worldly ways — i.e. repentance — and pointing others to the peaceful path of harmony with all that there is. It doesn’t generally involve running away to a monastery, or relocating to Foula in an effort to escape the bailiffs. We have to master two paradigms and two languages — the worldly and the spiritual — and navigate both simultaneously. It’s a bit like having “priest” and “policeman” modes with “therapist” the bridge then. This bridging is not a new conundrum, as hinted at by language like “Lords Temporal and Spiritual (i.e. eternal)” in the establishment of the Parliament at Westminster.

“Nothing is what it seems to be”

The intellectual awakening begins with identifying discrepancies and inconsistencies in accepted narratives, and seeking resolution to make us “whole-y” again. The desire to seek reconciliation, rather than ignoring the disconnects, is itself a profession of spirit, being a thirst for truth. Over time, we discover the world we inhabit is a seemingly endless maze of deceptions and distractions. In the process of unraveling it all, we are tasked at a personal level of discerning the sacred from the profane. The wicked problem is that the truth is everywhere (Jehovah’s Witnesses! Freemasons! Satanists! Catholics! Taoists!) and nowhere at the same time.

We inevitably become aware of a vast trove of occult knowledge, much hidden in plain sight. It is a return to our spiritual kindergarten, as much of what we had confidence in appears to be flimsy. I personally have found it to be an enormously humbling experience, having to descend from apparent academic success and plaudits back to the remedial class. I was in absolute ignorance of matters like the “unseen realm”, which prior would have been dismissed as ridiculous woo. Now I have a respect for the far greater possibilities, beyond anything I could have conceived of.

The intellectuals (scientific and theologic)

It is not a secret that intellectuals are the most prone to propaganda, having been pre-selected as the most obedient in society to the norms and doctrines of academia. Every dinner table of the chattering class hosts discussions on the finer points of compliance to official narratives, since to question their foundation is to exclude oneself from respectable society. There may be an Overton window of permitted discussion, and ritually denounced unclean beliefs, but the window itself has blinds that block out light from yonder dimensions.

I personally have experienced this as a recovering intellectual, and watched much of my cohort succumb to groupthink. It is like having teams of people who have proven themselves at mental drag racing in their 1000 horsepower cars at the dawn of adulthood, yet are totally lost in real life, which is more like rally driving with occasional reverse parking challenges. The first time they come to a dead-end, their journey is over; there is no reverse gear to unlearn anything. Pride in their identity as a high-achiever prevents any return to a beginner.

Their conformist beliefs are nonstop reinforced by their fellow endorsed members of the institutional structure. How could we all be wrong at the same time? Unthinkable! The religion of Scientism is not the only place where this happens. Every religion is a system that imposes itself between creation and Creator, with social rewards for recalling and adhering to its rites. They always take out spirit, and substitute rituals and rewards that can be administered. This swaps genuine holy law for man’s law; especially laws that demand sacrifices to the authorities or deities — be they “carbon credits”, financial tithes, or children’s souls.

Worship

We are sold in popular culture the idea of worship being prayers with hands clasped, or sinking to our knees, or songs of praise, or communion bread, or acts done on holy feast days. While those can be, indeed are, acts of worship, so too can be holding your fists high at a pop concert at the behest of some witch in robes manipulating the collective consciousness. Everything has a “telos” or end directedness, and what we worship is whatever we edify, venerate, and are (in the final reckoning) willing to die for. It can be good or evil, life or death, unifying or divisive, true or false, holy or unholy.

Narcissism is worship of self by elevation of self-will above that of all others. Psychopathy is what it leads to when fully matured. It often takes us empaths survival of multiple abusive relationships to have a language to describe the emotional trap we fall into, feeding the narcissist in the forlorn hope of fixing them. Through these trials and traumas we learn to spot and name the acts of worship in other contexts. For instance, when the judge at my council tax hearing said “we are here to collect money”, he was explicitly stating worship of Mammon took precedence over God in that courtroom. I could not previously have named that as worship: we slowly become conscious of the spiritual aspect.

Church

I did not realise that I was engaged in building a church, as I had swallowed the standard script that a church as a place you went to in order to get preached at and bored into submission. I now grasp that it is not a building, nor an institution, nor a membership list. Rather, it is where “two or more gather” with the intent of pursuit of righteousness of “the way”. My sense is that a massive institutional collapse of trust is coming to organised religion, and if you are reading this then you are likely in the vanguard of refounding church in your home and community.

Our job in church is to discern what is holy versus worldly, given the many counterfeit moralities, distorted texts, omitted histories, false interpretations, and egotistical traps. Church “done right” is where we hold each other to account, find respite from worldly ways, and offer mutual support from persecution. Most of all, it is where we minister to children, and begin to include them in the figural spiritual battle in life, this being how we manage to resist the worldly at a personal cost we can tolerate, so we don’t end up unnecessary martyrs.

Faith

Having been exposed to a cult as a child, I tended to avoid the entire lexicon of the liturgy for decades. Now I am returning to it, but through the eyes of experience and having fought in a spiritual and information war. Faith is not a blind belief in woo or veneration of idols. Rather, it is a rational belief in the unseen, both physical and metaphysical. It is an acceptance that we don’t have the whole picture, and most forces upon us are unseen and unseeable. This humble position is the one from which it is reasonable to extrapolate that “good wins”. Evil always overreaches, since it cannot parasitise the whole universe — there are cybernetic limits on psychopathy.

Spirit

Spirit is this ineffable thing that only seems to be explicable by paradox — “no, that wasn’t it!”. The holy spirit is that which leads to life; the religious spirit is its doppelgänger, which leads to a lifestyle. Spirituality is not the same as religion; but that is not to dismiss everything religious as lacking spirit. That said, the religious spirit is fundamentally unloving, as it leads towards division, discord, and conflict. Meanwhile, the holy spirit is loving, as it leads towards unity, harmony, and peace. New Age type spirituality is a variant on religion, as it still edifies the self and generates pride in being more “ascended”. Religion has the form of righteousness, spirituality has the substance.

Divinity

In the way I have seen the world explained, and I can relate to, this concept is the idea we are all beings of infinite worth. As “children of God” we have the creative urge, which is divine, without being the Creator. Meanwhile, evil says we are of finite worth, and offers up schemes to make up the difference. Divinity is not an “out there” woo, but the rigorous study of how everything connects, including the mystery of our own conscious existence. The divine has masculine and feminine divine forms, which can be related back to our electromagnetic universe and sacred geometry. For me the “aha!” moment was seeing how divinity had been edited out of my university’s intellectual panorama.

Divine will and sin

Taking the above a step further, divine will is that which is in harmony with the natural order of things, and contrasts with self-will (and other-will as its enslaved variant). We are indoctrinated to follow self-will via the creed of unrestricted individualism, but it innately lacks staying power; the divine (by construction) has eternity included as the “breath of life”.

Sin is knowing opposition to divine will, which I freely acknowledge is not standard church doctrine! Specifically, in the way I see the world, and some may object, sin is not a list of proscribed behaviours and constraining legalisms. That is to put the religious spirit counterfeit in its place, and we have seen the catastrophic failure of that model with Covid.

Satanism and evil

I once read that a satan is an accuser, in the same modality that a podesta is a chieftain. Satanism originates with pride, where we cannot repent sin. It is everywhere and always a projection, resulting in the false apportioning of blame, and finger pointing to deflect accountability. Satanism’s essential morality is sinful; the false accuser and bearing false witness are the foundation of its wickedness. Transhumanism is an extreme form of sin, as it attempts to redefine life, and is the end state of Satanism, as expunging the divine order is the most evil act possible.

Inversion

The Satanic doctrines that have ruled our world flip our morals (legalism) and upend truth (gaslighting). These values are deeply embedded into our legislation and administrative processes, making them exceptionally hard to uproot. The awakening process we are painfully experiencing is a consciousness of narcissism, sociopathy, and psychopathy dominate the framing of political and cultural discussion.

Evil by definition pursues the unrighteous and despicable, and at the heart of that inversion is the flip or confusion of divine masculine and feminine. This is why we see transgenderism pushed hard on children, which ultimately leads to asexual reproduction (clones, etc.). Everything in life necessarily converges on sex, as there is no natural life without it. The sexual act is then misunderstood at a category level, being all mind/body and horizontal relationships, no uplifying holy spirit involved.

The elite gender inversion that quietly permeates the upper echelons of society takes the substance of man or woman, and renders them into form, and swaps them over. This reversal of form and substance is foundational to evil, as it gives cover for wickedness via the appearance of good (e.g. climate change, clean air, equality). Each devilish scheme markets Truth™ and Morality™ in a fool’s form, claiming to be substance.

Contract vs covenant

To see how right and wrong become Wrong™ and Right™, we need to look at the binding of our relationships, and the “across” versus “up” paradigms. In the former, contracts create “trust” for psychos as much as patriots; they substitute for love and conscience. They are neither moral nor immoral, being a neutral tool. Meanwhile, covenant is a shared love for the sacred and divine, and governs agreements in a different way.

Contracts involve governing law, performance, accusation of breach, remedy, and even retribution. Covenant is founded on grace, relationships, and empathy. Divine will operates through covenants, Satanism via contracts. As it happens, the book of Galatians is all about this, and was removed from the Bible in slave states! That is because legalism substitutes “right” (adherence to local process like slave laws) in place of “righteous” (do unto others).

Marriage

If we are to get to the heart of the wickedness in society, we have to recognise the divine, and the perversion of the masculine and feminine energies. As such, the most basic step is to reconcile the institution of marriage to the way. We are being sold Marriage™, a state-brokered breeding contract. It is not even bilateral between husband and wife; we each separately contract with the state. It is part of the deception to “berth” us under maritime law, and steal our souls.

Marriage is meant to be a covenant; the spirit is united first, then mind and body. The ritual is not the marriage; nor the dress; the register entry; nor the cake. The wedding is the physical union, and that generally happens years before the Wedding Party®. There are no wedding vows in the Bible, and that is because we must face an unpleasant reality: most marriages are adultery and fornication in fancy dress. Even common law marriage is a worldly framing, based on habitation and sex.

Divine union

What is marriage supposed to be? It is meant to be a shared spirit of divine will, like two ping-pong balls in the mountain stream heading to the same ocean, who naturally stay in proximity. Marriage in its pure form is an abandonment of self-will; we each identify with the union itself. It is naturally at peace, as both parties submit to divine will and recognise that every discord starts with us. Disagreement on material matters is healthy and acceptable, as there is a deeper force of unity.

Baptism and communion

Looking further down this path than where I am at, there is a process of putting to death the self-will version of ego, taking up one’s cross, accepting obedience to natural order, and getting on with it. It seems to me to be meaningless to baptise without understanding spirit; typically it is a cheap “get wet and say words” discount Salvation™ offer that brings you into a social club. That is religious spirit, with no effect. To baptise a child is an insult, ceremonially dedicating them to the law of the waters.

Communion is meant to be a constant reminder that the purpose in following divine will over self-will is peace; it ends the (blood) sacrifice and war that feeds it. As such, the death of Jesus Christ is mis-sold; not so that trespasses under the law are forgiven, but that we are now free from the (Judiac) law. I am conscious of the Bible having been heavily edited, and our timelines are more fiction than fact. I keep an open mind and am reluctant to dedicate myself to any ritual without a spiritual safety case.

Ministry

Each of us who confronts our darkness, and does the shadow work, is helping others to seek “the way”, a ministry of redemption. We turn the other cheek to surface truth — “you are doing me wrong” — and raise consciousness where trespass was done out of habit. An awakening of the mind alone is prideful and arrogant; such a spirit leads to a degraded ministry that begins with oneself and our own self-righteousness. It causes preachers to edit their message to omit the aspects that discomfort themselves and their self-image. This cruelly leads people astray, and causes distrust in all those offering a ministry of truth and morality.

Grace is the key to peace

Having watched policemen, judges, lawyers, priests, therapists, councillors, and more struggle with these moral matters, I have realised that they are (also) “spiritually stuck”. Yes, there are costs for refusing to comply with immoral edicts in your job, and rejecting unethical professional codes. What they cannot face is that they have done wrong, and need to confront it. Grace is the unearned mercy that traverses the “ego gap”; the antidote to pride that allows us to accept our error without destroying ourselves in self-criticism.

Moreso than understanding, compassion, forgiveness, and many other laudable qualities, it is grace that offers an escape from the endless cycles of legalistic “I was only doing my job”. Grace is what functionaries are refusing to accept; yes, you can forgive yourself for collusion in a debt slavery system. It is the only way out of the cycle of accusation and revenge, as the precursor to reconciliation. The mercy comes from others; the grace is felt within. The locus of control means grace precedes everything else in the path to peace.

A spiritual awakening

“Awakening” is far more than learning all about Tartaria, giants, mudfloods, resets, or Antarctica — and the myriad tales that have been spun. Those are not superficial subjects, but they aren’t the essence of it. The collective awakening arises from our personal testament to the “narrow path”; the change we seek really is in ourselves, but in spirit, not just mind. You cannot awaken anyone other than yourself, and the spirital aspect is learned by experience, not words.

The best we can do is to be an example others wish to emulate, as you enjoy inner peace and emanate higher vibes. Indeed, many of us are realising that “live not by lies” applies to us every bit as much as the Deep State and its lackeys. The self-deceit — that we were righteous due to adopting approved social form rather than sacred substance — is absolutely everywhere. The time has come for the amicable divorce from the way we were, acting in unconscious self-will.

At a personal level, the justifications I have used to support my own opposition to divine will have lapsed. When I struggle with my own impurity, I have come to recognise that it is ordinary and acceptable to be wrong, but one one condition: I return to obedience to “the way”. The prize is not merely peace as the absence of conflict, but the potential for union with others that is rooted in the holy spirit, and generates lasting joy. That is my own graceful awakening — to divine will.